How much of yourself do you reveal in your writing ?

I recently shared this blog with a friend. Because I value my private thoughts to such a great extent that me sharing this with people I know is very rare. There are three friends who read this is and the rest are strangers scattered around the world.

My friend after reading it said to me that I seem to share very personal thoughts. I agree most often it is about my thoughts and demons that I seem to be battling. After all I did start this blog to mend a broken heart and wrote about it for days, weeks, ok I admit it,  I wrote about it for months.  The heart has now been mended, for the most part due to the writing.

However, one thing I have learnt through writing this blog is that I am no fiction writer. I have tried my hand at fiction and I somehow never seem to be able to put a cohesive sentence together. I sit down to write something fictional, but words constantly  fail me, where as if I am writing something I’ve experienced, the thoughts and words seem to flow easier.

When I was writing all those endless posts about heartache, not for a minute did I think about sharing my innermost thoughts with those who read it. When I was not running or baking/cooking, I sat at my computer and pecked away at the keys as a way to take away the hurt and pain I was feeling. I was using writing as a way to numb myself and release every thought that was flowing through my brain. It did not matter who read it, it was my release and I wanted it to set me free. I was hoping that writing it on here, was going to make the go away and for the most part it did.

Now that I am no longer hurting the same way, sharing my thoughts has become harder to do. I sit at the computer most days, lost for words, feeling like the mended heart has taken away my words too and I seem to want to weigh every thought that I type on here.

After my friend’s comment, I went back and read almost every post I had on here and I feel aghast that I bared so much of my soul.

However, a year later, I feel more reluctant to write about my thoughts that are flowing and I am more concerned about my privacy, which probably explains the lack of posts on here. There are so many thoughts floating through my brain, but every time I start to write, I realize that maybe I am saying too much and I need to draw the line somewhere… but where do I draw that line ? Sometimes I find that the line I draw seems to be in the sand and I censor myself, but yet reveal a little of my heart and soul. After all no matter what, I am no fiction writer and baring my soul is what helped me through difficult times and for that I will always be grateful.

So I ask you, where is that line you draw, how much of your soul do you bare on here ?

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About my random musings

I am originally from South East Asia and I moved to the US about 15 years ago to follow my heart. My heart has since been broken a few times, but I continue to be on journey of trying to mend it. I could talk about running, baking or writing in a small crowd, but put me in a room full of strangers and I will be the one standing in a corner people watching. When I am not writing or running, I would be in my kitchen, flour strewn all over the kitchen counters, music playing in the background and me just rolling and folding dough, excited about what my creation will turn out to be. Besides that I love passionately, when I love, I give it my all, not always a good thing, but that is who I am. I jump both feet in and sometimes I come out with regrets but having learnt a lesson. I believe everything happens for a reason and this is my place to share bits and pieces of my life, my adventures and sometimes misadventures. Hope you enjoy reading my stories as much I enjoy sharing them with you.
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7 Responses to How much of yourself do you reveal in your writing ?

  1. My writing is very personal. I think good writing has to come deep within your soul. That’s what people want to read.

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  2. amaya911 says:

    I write whatever I’m feeling within the moment, good or bad. I want to write about a death in my family sometime but I haven’t felt ready yet. I also want to write about abusive relationships I’ve been in but but not yet either. You can always go back and read your writing. If there’s stuff you don’t want to include after all then it can be deleted.

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    • Thank you Amaya. I try to write all that I am feeling, but sometimes you just don’t feel ready to share your thoughts with everyone around. Most often there is so much I want to say, but I find myself controlling what i write. I am trying to find a happy medium, but like everything else it is always a search for that happy medium. I hope you will eventually share your stories with us about the death and the abusive relationship you were in. Maybe that will help you heal.

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  3. sibillerose says:

    I haven’t had the chance to read you other posts yet, but for me, as a writer, you put as much of yourself into your writing as is necessary. I find it hard to distance myself from my writing (no matter what type of writing it is) and that something of myself always bleeds into the work. My advice would be to write whatever you are comfortable with sharing. If it’s baring your heart and soul or glazing over the intimate details, do whatever helps you the most; I’m positive that reading your story has helped some other people cope as well. As humans we seek solace in knowing that we are not alone… Also, whatever you want this blog to be should dictate how much you share (as long as you are willing of course). Don’t let others make you feel ashamed for being who you are comfortable being.

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    • Thank you so much for your response. Like you I too find it hard to distance myself from reality when I am writing. Somehow reading a personal story always makes me want to reach out to them. There is something about real life which we all can resonate with. Maybe that is why when I even read books, I tend to head towards non-fiction. Thank you again for your words of encouragement.

      Liked by 1 person

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